Judith’s expanding horizons in the 1950s

Judith received her “Leaving Certificate” at the end of 5^th Form (year 11) in 1951 from Camperdown High School in country Victoria, Australia.[i] 

After graduating, Judith got a job at one of the five banks in town. She swapped her school uniform for a bank uniform and began to ride her bicycle to work rather than school.

Photographer unknown, National Bank Employees Standing in front of the National Bank Camperdown, circa 1852, Victoria, Australia [T375]

Her evenings and weekends were a whirlwind of social activity. She attended local dances, including two debutant balls with her high school sweetheart, Patrick Mitchell. The first debutantes’ ball was the “High School Ex-Students Ball”, in August 1951, where Judith was one of sixteen debutantes.[ii] Propriety dictated that the girls were to be modest and have their shoulders covered, Judith, wondering where she would ever wear such a dress again, chose a shoestring strap gown that was more versatile  The gown was described in the papers as having a “Fitted bodice of broderie anglaise, with appliqued skirt, and appliqued shoulder cape of matching tulle”. The translucent cape enabled her to meet the requirement of covering her shoulders, even if it was a bit daring.

Photographer Frank Rhodes, Group photo of attendees at the Camperdown High School Ex-Students’ Association Debutante Ball Dress, Monday 9 August 1951, Theatre Royal, Camperdown, Victoria, Australia. (Judith is first on the right in the second row, her half-sister is the young girl in the front [T377]

Then came the Cobden Ball in September 1951, where she became the second runner up in the “Western district Belle of Debutantes”, from a field of 36 Debutants.[iii] She also played tennis at the St Andrew’s Church local Tennis club and rode horses as often as time would allow.

In a small country town, everyone knew your business. Not only were the dances reported in the newspapers but also her holidays:

“Miss Judith Todman, of the National Bank staff, Camperdown, is at present on annual leave.”[iv]

Then Judith’s stepfather, Stuart (Pop), passed away suddenly with no warning on 13 July 1952, just like her father had done when she was three. Pop was really the only father that she could remember and now he was gone. Once again everything changed as her brother was recalled from University, to which he would never return, to help his mother manage the farm.

After two years working at the bank, Judith wanted to see the wider world and so decided, almost a year after Pop’s passing, that nursing was the escape she was looking for. Judith moved to Melbourne in the middle of 1953 and began her nurse training, while living at the “Melbourne School of Nursing Student’s Hostel”, with other country and interstate nurse trainees.[v]

Photographer unknown, Graduating from Nurses School, 1956, Melbourne, Victoria, Australia [T348] From left: Wendy Dolling, June Mark, Barbara Lancomb, Phyllis Walker, Judith Todman, Louise Hamilton.

Halfway through 1956, Judith graduated from Nursing and immediately moved on to the midwifery course, which she completed during the following year. Her friend bought a Vesper Scooter. Judith was fascinated and went out and bought her own. They realised the freedom that the Vespers gave them to travel and the idea of an adventure was formed. Having received her double certificate, she returned home to work at Camperdown District Hospital in 1958. It was during this return to her childhood home that she decided to go through with her plans to travel to New Zealand, even though her original fellow travellers had dropped out. With replacement travelling companions found, Judith saved earnestly and after four months back in Camperdown was ready to launch off on her new adventure.

Judith and her two new girlfriends rode their Vesper motorbikes from Melbourne to Sydney and caught a ship to New Zealand, taking their bikes with them.  In between earning money as a lab technician, Judith and her friends toured around New Zealand for eight months. They arrived in New Zealand on January 28^th 1959 with 390 other passengers on the SS Monawarri. Much had happened in the 4-day journey across the Tasman. Judith had met John, eleven years her senior, an engineer and crew member. He had been so charming and attentive, so unlike the boys back home, debonair in his uniform.

Photographer Unknown, Judith and friend travel via Vespers from to Sydney via New South Wales, 1857, Australia Sandra Williamson’s private photograph collection [T337] [Judith of the right]

After returning from New Zealand Judith got a position at the Freemason’s Hospital, where she worked for six months, living in a flat near the hospital. But by June 1959 she was feeling restless again. There hadn’t been the camaraderie that she experienced during her training and being back in a uniform on the bottom rung again wasn’t much fun. 

Unhappy at work Judith dreamt of alternative futures: of working on the snowfields, getting a job as an air hostess or maybe even running away with John and starting a new life.  She returned briefly to Camperdown to attend her brother’s wedding. He was marrying one of her nursing girlfriends she had introduced him to. This was her third stint as a bridesmaid in Camperdown as more of her friends were settling down and getting married, staying and living in the place where they had grown up, but Judith realized she was not part of this world anymore.

On 23 July 1959 Judith finished up at the Freemason’s and used all her savings to buy a caravan and together she and John took off on their new adventure to look for work and a place to live.

They drove to the Grampians and lived in a caravan park. John managed to get some casual jobs close by in Stawell as a mechanic and some contract work in Mount Gambier.  Finally, he managed to secure a permanent position working for Frost Engineering in Hamilton, with a house as part of the employment contract.

Judith also managed to secure a position at the local Hamilton Hospital, however the job wasn’t the right fit for her and it didn’t work out. She then began working for a local photographer performing administrative support.

Photographer unknown, Judith Todman & John Williamson, 1959, Stawell, Victoria, Australia[T373]

John continued to look for better-paying work with a good house attached. Then, all of a sudden in the middle of 1960, he got an offer to work in Benalla and so they were on the move again.

Inspiration

This post was written in response to the writing prompt at Back to the 1950s  for more detail - see Elizabeth Swanay O'Neal, "The Genealogy Blog Party: Back to the 1950s," Heart of the Family™ (https://www.thefamilyheart.com/genealogy-blog-party-1950s/ : accessed April 28, 2022).

The story told here is but a partial telling of a much larger story as remembered by Judith herself and understood by her daughter Sandra and is based on continuing conversations that began a long time ago.

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Author 2022, Sandra Williamson

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Sources

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[i] 1950 'HIGH SCHOOL SCHOLARSHIP AND EXAMINATION RESULTS', Camperdown Chronicle (Vic. : 1877 - 1954), 10 March, p. 4. , viewed 28 Apr 2022, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article23573857

[ii] 1951 'SIXTEEN DEBUTANTES AT H.S. EX-STUDENTS' BALL', Camperdown Chronicle (Vic. : 1877 - 1954), 17 August, p. 1. , viewed 28 Apr 2022, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article28331337

[iii] 1951 'VICTORIAN DIARY Women lawyers have meeting', The Argus (Melbourne, Vic. : 1848 - 1957), 26 September, p. 9. , viewed 28 Apr 2022, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article23082188

[iv] 1952 'PERSONAL', Camperdown Chronicle (Vic. : 1877 - 1954), 5 February, p. 2. , viewed 28 Apr 2022, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article24001922

[v] 1953 'PERSONAL', Camperdown Chronicle (Vic. : 1877 - 1954), 5 June, p. 4. , viewed 28 Apr 2022, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article25114579

When Judy met John

Judy arrived on January 28th with 390 other passengers on the SS Monawarri. So much had happened in the 4-day journey across the Tasman from Australia to New Zealand. She had met John, eleven years her senior, an engineer and crew member. He had been so charming and attentive, so unlike the boys back home, debonair in his uniform.

Her work visa to New Zealand would allow her to work and travel freely during the year.

Photographer unknown, Together, 2 March 1858, New Zealand, [T336]

This is the beginning of their story told in their words.

John’s words are taken from letters that he wrote to Judy. His first letter to Judy was written on 1st February 1958. During this period, John was working on ships as a junior engineer, first for the Union Steamship Company on the Monowai, and then for the Adelaide Steamship Company on the Baroota. John returned to New Zealand only three times during the course of their correspondence, but on one of those occasions, they failed to meet.

Judy’s words are from her travel diary during the same period, her first entry on 28 February 1858, the last entry on the 8 March that same year.

Photographer Unknown, A romantic interlude, 2 March 1858, New Zealand [T331]

Over to Judy & John

Place: SS Monowai 1.2.1958 voice of John “I still can't figure whether it was all a dream or whether you are actually real. Either way, how wonderful. … I have to proceed very carefully now that I have run out of news else I'll make a complete fool of myself. You see my recollections of you are so vivid as to be almost painful. All of a sudden I am lonely, the future becomes important & frightening, my past crowds me & threatens me. Have you ever heard such rot? … Going around & around in my head is your comment "When we meet again it will be the same Judy & the same John" & I’m wishing for that with all my heart / till then, yours John”

Place: Lake Taupo. Date: 11-2-58 voice of Judy “It was my big moment I received a much awaited letter from John that wasn’t disappointing in any way…”

Place: Auckland. Date: 16-2-58 “News fash [sic] I think the Monowai may be due in Auckland this week – maybe today!! … [In a different pen:] No Monowai not due in till Wednesday shall just miss it.”

SS Monowai  16.2.1958 voice of John “… Very wonderful of you to write. It was just what the doctor ordered to lift up my flagging spirits. ... I’m hoping (but shouldn’t) that none of those N.Z. he men steal your heart away though I couldn’t blame them for trying. … we don’t sail until Monday. I plan to try to get Saturday afternoon & Sunday off. I would like to get away from the ship for a while & thought maybe I could hire a car. Perhaps camp or hotel at some picturesque country place. … There are two things uppermost in my mind at the moment, one is to get clear of the ship & the other is to steal as much of your company as possible but don’t let me make a nuisance of myself.

Place: Wellington Date: 1-3-58  voice of Judy “Thought I should meet John at noon. Packed & left my quarters feeling good. Missed John at noon. Tried to ring the Monowai – failed. Finnally rang 2pm from Harbour trust office. John not on board. What despair. Wandered the streets hopefully. Really at wits end when I accidently bumped into the girls – What joy & relief –  … Decided to visit Monowai … John was relieved, delighted and amazed to see us. He had spent £2.10 in taxi fees trying to get in touch with me. He had almost given up hope. Having both calmed down somewhat we set out with the girls, hired a car and set out for Paraparaumu [?]. It was great to be altogether again. So pleasant, so satisfying. There was such a lot of news to exchange. Our cabin was small but comfortable. We have china cups & teapot once again….”

Place: Paraparaumu Date: 2-3-58 voice of Judy “... The girls prepared a salad lunch & later John & I went driving into the hills. Saw a magnificent view from a summit 2467 feet up. It was sun set & I cannot do justice to the magnificent shades [?] that were reflected in the hills. So wide, so expansive & so peacefull [sic] was the view with the sun in the background. Regrettfully [sic] we had to return. … Everything was running to schedule when we had a flat tyre just inside Wellington what a quick change. John had to be back by 8am. I am so sad to see him go. ... Walked round Wellington the rest of the day in a trance.”

Place: Wellington. Date: 3 Mar 1958 voice of John - “Just a note in case you’re feeling as I am. … I’ve been running around the shopping centre since 1 o’clock, then down to the Ferry to Nelson at 1.45. Watched it sail at 2.30. No sign of Judy. Ugh. Better run now for Monowai”

Place: S.S. Monowai. Date: 8 March 1958 voice of John - “Well, how about that? You were still in Wellington while I was down on the Ferry wharf trying to catch a glimpse of you. …Long to see you again, John.”

Place: S.S. Monowai. Date: 13 March 1958 voice of John - “This writing letters to you when you are not receiving them is a frustrating business. I feel that I’m talking to the stars you’re so remote.  … How many eons is it since you said “I’d love to”, when I asked you for a dance. Nothing half-hearted about that! And I was a gonner [sic] from that point on. …

“I’m feeling rather crushed at the moment. I have been fired from the Monowai, can there be a greater insult than this? … Somehow it was most necessary for me to see you again, to make sure that I hadn't changed your mind about me. …  There was no letter waiting for me in Sydney, I wonder? … You are the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me, Judy, & your memory is about my sole asset right now. …

There I go again, you see how difficult it is? Every time I sit down to write to you I forget the present & can think only of my first real view of Wellington and the exhilarating ride on a blue motor scooter that went before. Just we two alone in a restaurant with soft lights, soft music, and a pocket handkerchief sized dance floor. Sitting with you on the very top of the world, a world that was hazy and full of hidden places but all so remote. Then there was the “joint” at Lower Hutt with the record covers stuck on the wall, & the crazy music & you so gay & laughing. A rainy night, a small car, & you saying “It’s not what I expected!!! …

You see, a man can’t experience these things & expect to ever be quite the same again. And so every time I sit still these are the thoughts that come flooding in & it is a big effort to think of news that would interest you.”

Photographer unknown, Beginning their life together, 1859, Stawell, Victoria, Australia, [B092]

This was just the beginning. A spark ignited that would fuel decisions with lifelong ramifications.

My Valentine

I met Wayne at my best friend Karen’s 21^st party. Karen & I had been best friends all through high school, and we spent most of our free time together.

Karen came from a family of 4 children and what seemed like hundred’s of Aunts, Uncles, and cousins. I would often attend Karen’s family informal family events and met all of her aunts and uncles with the exception of one family. I was always known as Karen’s little friend.

In 1980 we moved away I began living in another suburb, attending a new high school, and making new friends. Karen and I were no longer living within walking distance from each other and we drifted apart.

A few years later I was working at the Austin Hospital as a student nurse when Karen called to say her Uncle had been admitted to the Austin and could I visit him and check that he was ok. We had drifted apart but I was pleased to make the connection again and went to visit her Uncle Geoff in the cancer ward. He was the one uncle that I had never met, but he was still pleased to see me and with a broad smile on his face he said: “so you are Karen’s little friend”.

Photographer unknown, The Benton family taken just before Geoff died, 1981, Cheltenham Park, Cheltenham, Victoria, Australia [ben017]

Geoff passed away soon after that meeting on the 9th November 1981 in hospital, leaving a wife and 3 grown children behind.  On 26 May 1982, Karen celebrated her 21^st birthday in a local hall, all her cousins and relatives include a dashing (or so I thought) young man named Wayne.  I don’t remember much about the night in general but I do remember the details of my first encounter with Wayne.

I remember seeing him across the room in his very tight light green jeans and tight jumper talking and laughing with others. 

During a quiet moment, I approached and asked him to dance, which he politely declined saying he had a gummy leg. Not deterred I asked another two times until he eventually agreed to dance with me. My heart fluttered. I had expected for him to return to the crowds straight after our dance but like in the fairy tales we filled space between dancing with talking, never really leaving the dance floor until the end of the evening.

Phtoographer unknown, Sandra  & Wayne(Sandra Wearing the dress that she met Wayne in), circa 1981, Location not known –[ben056]

We talked about a lot of things including my visit to his father before he died and how happy he had been when I saw him in hospital. I was determined not to be fooled by his charm and began to run through my elimination questions which I used to help me determine whether I should proceed in engaging in conversation with a potential partner. I can’t quite remember what all the questions were but I do remember looking for his reaction when I told him that I owned and rode a motorbike rather than a car. His demeanor did not change to disapproval nor did he seem to be “shocked” by the revelation.

As the evening came to close he asked me if he could drive me home. It seemed a bit ridiculous after all I was staying at Karen’s for the evening.  But everyone encouraged me to let Wayne drive me the short distance to Karen’s home.  We pulled up in the front of her home and sat talking in his car for some time. Eventually, we saw the venations blinds being separated and we knew that everyone was peeking through the blinds watching to see what was happening.  I could feel the colour rise in my cheeks. It was only then that Karen’s younger brother Craig came running out of the front door with a ridiculous grin on his face and asked what was wrong. At which point Wayne asked him if he could get him a pen as he wanted to write my number down, and neither of us had a pen. Craig ran inside with a great sense of urgency and return with pen in hand.  The Venetians now had several eyes peeking through them watching our every move.

I gave Wayne my number and got out of the car and went into the house. I don’t remember much after that other than everyone kept telling me what a nice fellow Wayne was. Most likely Karen and I would have spent the remainder of the night talking about the evening sharing stories until we fell asleep.

Photographer Mark Williamson, Wayne & Sandra on their wedding day 21 June 1986, Mt Waverley, Victoria Australia [Ben056]

It felt as though we had been destined to meet we had been moving in similar circles but somehow in those years our paths had never crossed. 

Photographer Lisa Lionnet-Swaan, Wayne Benton & Sandra Williamson, March 2017, Sandringham

Over the years we have attended quite a few events with Wayne’s extended family, where I ironically know more about his extended family than he does having grown up visiting them all (except Wayne’s family) as Karen’s little friend.

I still see my friend Karen but now only at funerals or weddings. Wayne & I have now been together for almost 36 years. Since then we have only danced a few times together as he always laughs and says he has a war wound and can’t dance.

This post is part was originally part of  The February Genealogy Blog Party: Stories of Love